Midnight SILHOUETTE /

MIDNIGHT!/ Monday, April 02, 2007

Hey there, for all those people out there who bothers about how i'm doing in my life, THANK YOU!! And yes...its been quite a while since i updated so...erm..please forgive me.Alot of major changes in my life have been happening so i'm still adjusting. So alright..well..i guess i shall start from the beginning, after my o lvls. So here it goes...please dun fall asleep>.<.
Well generally, I got accepted to TP's Business Studies Group along with 3 of my other classmates.Which is actually not bad cuz i managed to get into the top 3 courses i wanted. i actually placed NP's business first >.<>.< style="font-family:Arial;">Well...after all this, i went to get a job at Bata. AND THE NEXT PERSON WHO SAYS I'M NOT SUITED FOR THE JOB, TO HELL WITH YA!!! so what if i look like i can kill the next person that comes along or i look too superficial to serve others!!! This is me! all me...i may not be pretty or that nice but still...the marketing world has always appealed to me so please just respect what i love.I'm sick and tired of hearing my family and friends all gasped everytime i tell them i enjoy my work.I do enjoy it.I may be short and fat but still, i enjoy what i do!I never knew why but I always enjoyed being in the retail or F&B business,where i could make sales to people.I admit i may not be the best in this line but i'm still good at it.I've already tried sitting behind a desk and covering myself with paperwork but I just cant do it.T.T I really tried but somehow i always felt so trapped there..and i actually felt into depression during that job.Oh if only you could understand..I dun wan a job where i can only look through the window to see the world..stability isnt the only factor that matters to me.I enjoy meeting new people...learning new things...why the hell did you think i requested for Discovery Travel and Channel on my SCV! When i wanted to be a psychiatrist, everyone told me to give up on my dream..just cause i appear to be blur and stupid to this people.Only a few people actually bothered to push me on.I really dunno what I wanna do in my life anymore...I dun wanna be judged on my appearance or performance anymore..I'm so tired right now..so lost...so many things are pushing to me to change and adapt but..its all too soon...I really wanna earn my freedom someday...no longer a slave to society or trapped in my own house...i really wanna know where i truly belong someday...where i can be the reason for someone's smile someday.I really wanna be the reason behind the smiles of the people i love.Where for once in my life, my family and friends would be proud of me.Not just happy...but proud that I'm a member of their family and their friend.I wanna make it big someday and I'm willing to work hard for it. So it would be better if you would stop judging me and just keep silent. Even if you dun approve of what i do, please just zip it. Cuz your words matter to me...and if you disapprove, that pain would scar me for the rest of my life.

I hate you .
9:31 AM <3

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